Yet, here I was, safe on the mountain with boys who militantly enforced the rules to protect Cord from possibly getting COVID. As he lives with heart failure yet continues to work so hard, rain or shine, they had his back every step of the way. My heart is grateful. We are so lucky to live in the woods in times like this. Having 'permission' to stay home and stay safe was good medicine for us. Although we were out of work for a good part of the year, we made it through.
My time in the woods is precious, I know and love each tree, each rock, each path. The anguish I felt in the ether was palpable and all I could do was try to respond with love.
I know I am blessed to live on this mountain, amongst these ancient trees, watching these ancient skies. I never get tired of it and in fact, it has drawn me even closer to nature, our life here, my boys, the large and small wonders that are all around me and self-love. I am also much more aware of and fascinated by the People who lived on this land, in this case the Ute. With trees that could be 1,000 years old, I know their children played beneath the same trees mine did. It is a precious connection I do not take lightly.
Two of my boys and their significant others got sick with COVID early on in the pandemic yet still managed to finish their work and responsibilities. Beau graduated from college with honors with a degree in business. Max completed his 2nd year of Law School and writing for the Law Review. Wulfgar lost so much, most of his friends were seniors and they all graduated and left. There was no more music or music teacher or drama in the school, the play got shut down and Shakespeare in the Park got cancelled. He is now a senior and is adapting to a new and very different life. I give him all respect - he is so strong and although this is all so disappointing, he remains the wonderful, funny, kind person I know and love.
We said goodbye to our 35 year old mare Baby this summer. It all happened so fast and she was in the ground next to her mother within hours of the diagnosis of a spinal injury. She came up to me nickering with ears pointed forward and had a lovely bucket of her favorite feed just before she left this earth. The picture of the painted sky below happened at the same moment. She was a tri-colored buckskin paint. She was a wonderful part of our family.
At the top of July it became dire that my 92 year old mother needed to move into assisted living. That took the family rallying and a large part of the summer. She is safe and surrounded with her art, the facility has a perfect record for no cases of COVID and she is well taken care of. But we can't see her at the moment. So I write her regularly and see her on the porch when it's allowed. We must stay strong and do our part until this is over. She is so brave and her whole life changed without her family to help her inside her new home. She never ceases to amaze me. Her era of people are the strongest, most resilient on earth. And that smile! The time I spent packing her up is the most precious time I've ever had with her. She has led an absolutely amazing life and I was humbled to see it all as we went through every single thing she owns and sorted it out. I am in awe Mom.
A week after I got home from getting my mother safe, it snowed for 4 days and I lost 90% of my seed crop. It's ok - I got some and I am blessed with banked seed from the gloriously abundant years before.
So, to all of you who have suffered loss, felt the pain, worried yourselves silly, I feel ya, even though I know how lucky I am to not have lost a loved one to COVID. From this turmoil will come a great big pendulum swing. Life will keep turning, seasons will keep coming and sunsets and sunrises will keep occurring. I am busy everyday sending love on the wind to you all.